Author Archives: majorterata

F is for Ford

Detroit automakers hate government regulations and will deploy armies of lobbyists to get their way in Washington. And they routinely win. The argument goes like this: auto industry experts at such companies as GM, Chrysler and Ford know way more … Continue reading

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Solved: The Mystery of the Dead (W)Ailes

Last week, the unidentified rotting corpse of a 50-foot-long corpulent creature washed up on a beach in Indonesia. Confused locals took photographs with their smartphones that went around the world of the immense blob of slimy, smelly flesh. Noxious decomposition … Continue reading

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IBM: Dow and Out?

What is the life span of a stock in “dog-of-the-Dow” years? It’s been a rather bad month for IBM. Since announcing 1Q 2017 earnings in early April, the stock is down over 20 points to $150 a share – a … Continue reading

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Those Who Can’t Do Preach

Ivanka Trump, no doubt with extensive help from one or more ghostwriters, released a new book titled “Women Who Work: Rewriting the Rules for Success” – and the response has been either stellar or vicious depending on whether the reader … Continue reading

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The Outrage of Eddie Munster

Paul Ryan recites the hypocritic oath. Billions of gallons of ink will be spilt over the House of Representative’s vote yesterday to repeal Obamacare and replace it with “something terrific” – if you consider “terrific” the taking away of myriad … Continue reading

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The Berry Doesn’t Fall Far From the Dingle

Jesse Watters, smirky understudy to former Fox miscreant Bill O’Reilly stepped on his own dick the other day by proffering very ill-timed innuendo about Ivanka Trump’s skill at holding a phallic microphone. Ill-timed because the last thing Fox needs now … Continue reading

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Trump’s Massive Tax Hike on American Corporations

Trump’s “tax reform plan” on the back of an envelope. Trump released a one-page list of “bullet points” that was touted by his administration as a once-in-a-generation tax overhaul, but derided by economists as nothing more than a big tax … Continue reading

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“O” Zone Depletion

Bill O’Reilly articulates his feelings about getting the boot from Fox In his most recent and ill-timed book release titled “Old School,” one-time king of Fox punditry Bill O’Reilly – sounding like a crotchety bastard who demands of neighborhood kids: … Continue reading

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The Easter Charade

“On the Avenue….Fifth Avenue…” Ever since Jesus Christ rose from the dead, and with the help of a bunny rabbit saw his own shadow thus predicting 2,000 more years of Christianity, followers have celebrated the event by hiding and seeking … Continue reading

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Alien Abduction

There’s only one explanation for it: Trump was abducted by aliens and replaced with a hollow orange shell topped by a lemon meringue hairpiece. Sometime after January 20 – perhaps from the rooftop of Trump Tower or the 9th hole … Continue reading

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Hungry Monster Interview

The following is a reprint of an interview conducted with Herb Schultz, author of RonnieandLennie that first appeared April 8, 2017 on The Hungry Monster. A Turbulent Time RonnieandLennie is a story about conjoined twins, set in the hippie days … Continue reading

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Untied Airlines

A United Airlines passenger who had paid for a valid ticket and was sitting in his assigned seat – locked and in the upright position, tray table stowed – was forcibly removed by thuggish “airport cops” because the airline needed … Continue reading

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Abolish the Senate

The Republican majority in the Senate, as expected, voted to eliminate the filibuster rule as it applies to Supreme Court nominees. If the trend continues and the filibuster is eliminated altogether, then the Senate should be abolished as nothing more … Continue reading

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Sneaky Pete’s is Back

For more than 50 years Pete Ciacchini and his wife owned and managed a bar that was once a 1920s speakeasy in Erie, Pennsylvania. The bar, which had not undergone a facelift since at least the Eisenhower era was formally … Continue reading

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Trump and His Executive Odors

NAFTA-hater Trump signed two executive orders this past Friday that are intended to lay the groundwork for new policies and stricter enforcement of trade laws. In a ceremony akin to the recognition of a Nobel laureate, the Orange man scribbled … Continue reading

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Showing Some Thigh

Last June, citizens of the United Kingdom shocked the Western world when they voted 52 to 48 percent to leave the European Union. Interestingly, the Scottish voted quite overwhelmingly 62 to 38 against leaving the EU, also known as “Brexit.” … Continue reading

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The AHCA Turns into an ACHE

Paul Ryan explains what Congress’s new toilet paper will be made of. A man rolls into an emergency room with a large but routine gash on his leg. Expecting to have his wound stitched up, he’s instead told that the … Continue reading

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Tears for Sears

On page 48 of the 2016 Annual Report for Sears, a company that was a venerated retailer for more than a century until a thing called “the internets” intruded, we find this remarkable passage: “Our historical operating results indicate substantial … Continue reading

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Not to Be Confused With

Although the Trump Administration is already 50 long days into the term, most of his key advisors and cabinet members are still unknown to many Americans. Perhaps it’s because few of them have ever served in public office before, and … Continue reading

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NSA to Wikileaks: 404 Page Not Found

By now it should be clear that Wikileaks and its slithery founder Julian Assange exist explicitly to hurt and embarrass the United States – not that the U.S. doesn’t deserve some reprobation for its decidedly covert, undemocratic actions. But the … Continue reading

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