Author Archives: majorterata

The Berry Doesn’t Fall Far From the Dingle

Jesse Watters, smirky understudy to former Fox miscreant Bill O’Reilly stepped on his own dick the other day by proffering very ill-timed innuendo about Ivanka Trump’s skill at holding a phallic microphone. Ill-timed because the last thing Fox needs now … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged , , | Comments Off

Trump’s Massive Tax Hike on American Corporations

Trump’s “tax reform plan” on the back of an envelope. Trump released a one-page list of “bullet points” that was touted by his administration as a once-in-a-generation tax overhaul, but derided by economists as nothing more than a big tax … Continue reading

Posted in Politics | Tagged , | Comments Off

“O” Zone Depletion

Bill O’Reilly articulates his feelings about getting the boot from Fox In his most recent and ill-timed book release titled “Old School,” one-time king of Fox punditry Bill O’Reilly – sounding like a crotchety bastard who demands of neighborhood kids: … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off

The Easter Charade

“On the Avenue….Fifth Avenue…” Ever since Jesus Christ rose from the dead, and with the help of a bunny rabbit saw his own shadow thus predicting 2,000 more years of Christianity, followers have celebrated the event by hiding and seeking … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged , | Comments Off

Alien Abduction

There’s only one explanation for it: Trump was abducted by aliens and replaced with a hollow orange shell topped by a lemon meringue hairpiece. Sometime after January 20 – perhaps from the rooftop of Trump Tower or the 9th hole … Continue reading

Posted in Politics | Tagged | Comments Off

Hungry Monster Interview

The following is a reprint of an interview conducted with Herb Schultz, author of RonnieandLennie that first appeared April 8, 2017 on The Hungry Monster. A Turbulent Time RonnieandLennie is a story about conjoined twins, set in the hippie days … Continue reading

Posted in books | Comments Off

Untied Airlines

A United Airlines passenger who had paid for a valid ticket and was sitting in his assigned seat – locked and in the upright position, tray table stowed – was forcibly removed by thuggish “airport cops” because the airline needed … Continue reading

Posted in Business | Tagged , | Comments Off

Abolish the Senate

The Republican majority in the Senate, as expected, voted to eliminate the filibuster rule as it applies to Supreme Court nominees. If the trend continues and the filibuster is eliminated altogether, then the Senate should be abolished as nothing more … Continue reading

Posted in Politics, TV | Tagged , , | Comments Off

Sneaky Pete’s is Back

For more than 50 years Pete Ciacchini and his wife owned and managed a bar that was once a 1920s speakeasy in Erie, Pennsylvania. The bar, which had not undergone a facelift since at least the Eisenhower era was formally … Continue reading

Posted in Restaurants | Comments Off

Trump and His Executive Odors

NAFTA-hater Trump signed two executive orders this past Friday that are intended to lay the groundwork for new policies and stricter enforcement of trade laws. In a ceremony akin to the recognition of a Nobel laureate, the Orange man scribbled … Continue reading

Posted in Politics, TV | Tagged , , | Comments Off

Showing Some Thigh

Last June, citizens of the United Kingdom shocked the Western world when they voted 52 to 48 percent to leave the European Union. Interestingly, the Scottish voted quite overwhelmingly 62 to 38 against leaving the EU, also known as “Brexit.” … Continue reading

Posted in Newspaper, Travel | Tagged , | Comments Off

The AHCA Turns into an ACHE

Paul Ryan explains what Congress’s new toilet paper will be made of. A man rolls into an emergency room with a large but routine gash on his leg. Expecting to have his wound stitched up, he’s instead told that the … Continue reading

Posted in Obits, Politics, TV | Tagged , , | Comments Off

Tears for Sears

On page 48 of the 2016 Annual Report for Sears, a company that was a venerated retailer for more than a century until a thing called “the internets” intruded, we find this remarkable passage: “Our historical operating results indicate substantial … Continue reading

Posted in Business, Politics | Tagged , | Comments Off

Not to Be Confused With

Although the Trump Administration is already 50 long days into the term, most of his key advisors and cabinet members are still unknown to many Americans. Perhaps it’s because few of them have ever served in public office before, and … Continue reading

Posted in Politics | Comments Off

NSA to Wikileaks: 404 Page Not Found

By now it should be clear that Wikileaks and its slithery founder Julian Assange exist explicitly to hurt and embarrass the United States – not that the U.S. doesn’t deserve some reprobation for its decidedly covert, undemocratic actions. But the … Continue reading

Posted in Newspaper, Politics | Tagged , , , | Comments Off

Wire Fraud

As soon as he completes remedial spelling, Trump to call for Congressional investigation into whether Obama is bad, or just sick. There are plenty of reasons to disbelieve Trump’s claim that Obama issued an order to “tapp” the Orange man’s … Continue reading

Posted in Politics | Tagged , | Comments Off

This Week in Boners

It never ceases to amaze how often highly-paid, so-called professionals screw the pooch. Here is a brief synopsis of just some of the boners pulled this past week. The Oh, Really? Factor Fox News stooge and formerly bow-tied dweeb Tucker … Continue reading

Posted in Movies, Politics | Tagged , , , , | Comments Off

Trumpus Interruptus

All-Trump-all-the-time is beginning to wear thin. Major Terata will lay off the Orange man and the gaseous cloud that envelops his fantasy world for awhile. We’ll give him leave so he can climb aboard Marine One and pursue new elixirs … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Comments Off

Forget Fact-Checking; Just Call “Bullshit”

Trump at CPAC in front of streamlined Constitution. Now with 66% fewer amendments! Thanks to a last-minute invitation from a group of gay Republicans, Trump snagged a speaking slot at the 2011 gathering of the Conservative Political Action Conference where … Continue reading

Posted in Politics | Tagged , , | Comments Off

No Reach-Around from CPAC for Milo

Conservative, gay rabble-rouser Milo Yiannopoulos (nee. Hanrahan) was thwarted recently from making a speech at U.C. Berkeley by rowdy students who didn’t appreciate giving the flaming flame-thrower a platform to disgorge what they considered hate speech. Based on Yiannopoulos’ past, … Continue reading

Posted in Business, Politics | Tagged | Comments Off