The Envelope Please…

streep…And the award for most overrated actress goes to….

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Meryl Streep! This is the first award for Ms. Streep in the category of most overrated actress, and the only award she has never won. Truly an honor. Deepest congratulations, Ms. Streep on adding this prestigious accolade to your three Academy Awards, your eight Golden Globes, your three Critics’ Choice Movie Awards, your ten People’s Choice Awards, your two Screen Actors Guild Awards, your three Elle Women in Hollywood Awards, your four Italian Online Movie Awards, your six Kansas City Film Critics Circle Awards, your two London Film Critics’ Circle Awards, your four Los Angeles Film Critics Association Awards, your four National Board of Review Awards, your four National Society of Film Critics Awards, your five New York Film Critics Circle Awards, your two Primetime Emmys, oh, and your Presidential Medal of Freedom Award.

You are truly, truly overrated.

Next up, we reveal the winner of the best bad actor in a dual role. The nominees are Kim Jong Un for his portrayal of a lunatic dictator of a small impoverished country AND an addled Rogaine addict who forces Edward Scissorhands cut his locks; Rodrigo Duterte as the murderous thug president of the Philippines AND the unrivaled impersonator of Mr. Hankey.

hankey

And finally, in what may be the first of many ignoble awards to be bestowed upon him in the coming days and years, Donald Trump for his spot-on mockery of a disabled reporter AND his heartfelt performance afterwards denying what 50 million people saw with their own eyes – and pulling it off for at least 25 million of them who shrouded their heads and bellowed “Hoax!”

trumpserge

And the award goes to….

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Making America Great Again – Donald Trump! Accepting on behalf of his majesty is “Trump Whisperer” Kelly Ann Conway…

conway

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