Trump Falls for the Columbo Treatment

muellercolumboThose old enough to remember watching the TV series “Columbo” will recall with head-shaking amazement how the eponymous, bumbling, trenchcoat-wearing detective always cracked the week’s criminal case by luring the perp into a false sense of security that he was dealing with an idiot – when in fact Columbo was a mastermind of detection. Columbo – played with blithering aplomb by Peter Falk – would stammer, fumble, scratch his head, and otherwise act the fool, all the while ensnaring his prey. There was always just one more thing to ask the suspect.

Early in an episode the criminal would acquire a sense of invincibility in the face of Columbo’s perceived ineptitude – then fall hard in the end when the evidence was piled high in front of him. Columbo essentially solved crimes by wearing down the suspect into exasperation, driving him to the point of practically begging to be arrested just so he didn’t have to entertain anymore of Columbo’s irritating questions.

Watch Columbo do his shtick.

I now think Trump is that type of suspect. Imagine an episode with special prosecutor Robert Mueller as Columbo and Trump as the arrogant criminal. True to the formula, Trump goes over the top to protest his innocence, presuming that the flunky Mueller and his dumbass staff will quickly veer from the trail and fold up the futile investigation. For someone who professes innocence at every turn, and throws shade at the likes of Hillary Clinton, Obama, Rod Rosenstein and Jeff Sessions, Trump sure as hell sounds like a guilty man.

Wouldn’t it make more sense for an innocent Trump to step aside and let Mueller come to the conclusion that no collusion with Russia took place and that no crime was committed? Why continue to denigrate the investigation and seek to shut it down if you’re innocent when letting it play out is the best way to achieve complete and incontrovertible exoneration?

The answer must be that Trump fears Mueller will slog along like the rumpled Columbo and methodically back him and his team of nitwits into a corner. This will proceed post haste should Trump ever come to be interviewed bu Mueller.

Of course, Trump could deviate from the “Columbo” script and take out his inquisitor – but something tells me Mueller has a package ready to publish should a firing be in the offing.

Like the old TV series, expect to see Trump’s ashen face when Mueller slams the steel filing cabinet shut.

Thoughts and Prayers

“Thoughts and prayers” translated: “Sorry – now please go away.”


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